Others Won’t Create The Perfect Circumstances For You

photo credit: dotbenjamin

Are you thinking “if only person A did this, and person B did this, and person C helped me with this, I would be able to really succeed”?  If so, you have to toss away that thinking.  Things don’t work out that way.  First off, people don’t know what you desire until you tell them, and second, even if you tell them, that doesn’t mean they are up for taking part as you have envisioned.

Your Focus Is To Be On You

This is an empowering thing to keep in mind.  Next time you get a thought like “if only this person did this”, realize it is not valuable.  You can’t let yourself be in the hands of someone else, as that is the opposite of self-control.  You have to run your own show.  Other people have their own show in place.

Bigshots Did What They Could Early On

Also, as you notice with successful folks, they didn’t need the perfect circumstances.  They needed their hunger and patience.  Later on, biographers describe their circumstances as having been great, or so on, but they took whatever they had and labeled that “the right circumstances”.  You can do the same.

The day when everyone is on the same page as you in bringing your initiative to fruition is not going to come.  That isn’t a real day.  It is an idealized day, and you shouldn’t need it anyway.  Maybe a couple are on your support team and a couple are either not helpful, or possibly against you in some way.  That is the normal way of things, and so you need to see it as normal and not bad.

That Ideal Day Is As Uncommon As Winning The Lottery

The perfect day doesn’t come, and even if it did, it wouldn’t impact you as you would imagine.  Instead, remember that today is a day that has come, and that is good enough.  You certainly have some potential in this instance, and ignoring that potential in search of some greater potential is like not eating bread, even though you are hungry, because there is a chance you may later have bread and cheese.  While bread and cheese can certainly be great, you don’t need that combination to be effective.  Also, if you can do fine with just bread, if bread and cheese arrives as a package for you later, you will have your self-discipline maintained, along with a reward on top of it.

Others Have Their Own Items To Focus On

People do generally have a sense of your desires, but they either might not be available, or don’t have the interest in helping, or don’t feel that they have the ability to help or support you.  Blaming others for any lack of support takes power away from you.  It is like saying you need their support to proceed, which is a very limited state of effectiveness.

Create Your Plan Around Your Own Abilities

You have to take a potential lack of support into account when you plan your efforts.  Know that not everyone will come to your side, and that you might have very little in the form of assistance.  This has to be in your game plan.  If you formulate a game plan that expects too much of others, you’ll get part of the way there and start to break down, because one of your “fuel sources” is depleted.  You can think of support like a fuel source, because support and help from others does lead you to take more action than you normally would.

Taking that into account means planning for having less fuel than what you think of as being at a full tank.  You have to be able to replenish your own fuel at times, through directed thinking, or exercise of some sort, or so on.  As I pointed out in a recent article, you might need some “foolish pride” to get through the difficult part of your venture.  That is somewhat like creating fuel out of thin air, at least temporarily.

When It Is Based On You, It Gets Done

There are quite a few folks waiting for a certain event or state of events to arise before they do something important they have been thinking of.  There are risks associated with this.  One is that you miss out on opportunities that would have been available had the action just been taken on a regular day, during regular circumstances.  Another risk is that the special day or period of time doesn’t come, and then the whole process is not started.  There is little we regret more than something we did not do.

So, when is the special day or time to act?  Many say you should treat today as that special day of sorts.  This is reasonable.  Also, you could leave tomorrow as your big action day, as long as it is tomorrow from today and not a vague “tomorrow”.

Do you have any examples that come to mind, where you have left control in the hands of others, in hopes of great results?  Let us know in the comments.

Tagged as: circumstances, others, perfect